The groupies at Texans for Rick Perry have created a new music video promoting a gubernatorial “three-peat” for their heartthrob leader, and it features Ozzy Osbourne’s 1980 smash “Crazy Train”!
The commercial attacks Perry’s Democratic challenger, Bill White, for driving the “Metrogate”–a crazy train full of lies, frauds, and mosquito larvae — back when he was president of Houston; White’s the guy in the commercial whose eyes shift all around as he fantasizes about Sharon Osbourne, which is a sin against God. The footage of shredded paper works well with Randy Rhoads’ shredding on the geetar, and the crashes really drive the point home. But will this friendly gesture toward immoral rock and roll voters backfire in the end? Perry should probably play it safe and use an Amy Grant song in his next attack ad, because that’s what Jesus would do.
This video surfaced a little earlier today courtesy of the Perry camp, blasting White's handling of the ongoing Metro debacle here in Houston to the rote strains of Ozzy Osbourne's 1980 smash solo debut single "Crazy Train." The song, which features bitchin' guitar work from the late Randy Rhoads (rest in peace, mourn you 'til we join you, etc.), is about the state of the world in 1980. You know, the Cold War, commies lurking around your Pac-Man arcade game trying to sell you crack and Richard Pryor setting his face on fire while freebasing, that kind of thing. If we were in charge of making this campaign video, we would have used the Guns 'N Roses drug anthem "Night Train," considering most of the people we see riding on the Metro past a certain time of night are high as a kite. Maybe Perry is more a purist and thinks that metal died with Rhoads in 1982? Hell, they could have used Berlin's "The Metro" to pull in hipster voters, seeing how the song was also covered by Alkaline Trio. The Perry team could have even bought time at Numbers on Friday nights and ran the ad to get everyone's attention and put voter-registration tables in the bathrooms or in that creepy upstairs room where babies come from.
And then today, they got their Ozzy on, debuting this video set to the seminal Ozzy Osbourne song “Crazy Train” (True story: One time this guy called to ask me out, and got my answering machine and sang the chorus, in its entirety, as his invitation).